It’s Always Something

I was surprised, honestly and truly, to the comments on last week’s post. What floored me—I am always touched by the thoughtful observations of my readers—were the notes about the volume of tasks I undertook. Creativity Clock

In my mind, I am always falling behind on the list chores I set for myself. Life has a way of meddling with good intentions. And if truth be known, I am generally the cause of my derailment.

I wake up in a mood – you know the sort, when your hair is suddenly hideous, your heart is heavier than an anvil, your mind is consumed with what-if scenarios all of which doubt plays a lead role in, or your skin is either too big or too small.

Nothing seems achievable when I am swirling in Hurricane Brenda.

 

News reports from the shoreline are grim.

Today Hurricane Brenda swallowed the doubt pill and has taken out the entire town of Creative Haven, her own private Idaho…

Hurricane Brenda continues to rage.  Sources close to the family have heard she is swirling rapidly but going nowhere…

hurricane brenda 

I’ve learned to step over myself during my ‘moodier’ days. There is nothing to be done except push pass Hurricane Brenda and give way to the rush of illogical drama unfolding in my head.  I let it run its course.

If my hair was perfect yesterday and the day before that, and the one before that, what is wrong with it today?

If my heart was free of anguish then what’s different in this moment?

As for the skin around my bones suddenly feeling misaligned, I’ve learned to accept this as growth and or change. Something in me is moving on or I need to leave something behind. Until I confront what that something is, I’m saddled with the accompanying discomfort.

The self-manufactured evil doubt vapor requires a bit of finesse and mental prowess. Knowing I conjured it doesn’t make it any easier to cope with when it’s racing through my blood as the Looney Tunes Tasmanian Devil does through a strip of celluloid.

Life or moi can wreck havoc on my to-do list and quite honestly it usually does, but when it doesn’t, I scurry to get through a stack of to-dos.

So why was I surprised at the responses to my post last week? I hadn’t meant to sound like an over achiever although I wish sometimes I had those tendencies. The facts are that I am easily distracted by shiny things or lanky with come-hither eyed characters who invade my daytime dreams.  Therefore, I do what I can when I can, knowing that there is always some mischief lurking around the corner waiting for the exact moment to derail my good intentions. Creativity marches to it’s own beat. I try to keep up.

One lesson I’ve recently learned—due to a recent job change—is to take advantage of shorter time intervals.  Barbara, over at Empty Nest Mom, wrote a fabulous post on making room for the illusive ten minutes, check it out.

One a side note, I sometimes wish that I hadn’t waited so very long to chase this dream of being a writer. Maybe time wouldn’t seem so priceless.  I guess it’s one of those things I’ll never know unless I invent a time machine, go back in time, and rewrite my story.

 

What are your tips for balancing the never-ending list of chores with dreams in the demanding must do- have it all life you lead? 

 

by

I’m a writer and hoarder of one-size-fits-all panty hose. Until the hose fits over my bum, I write to provide an alternative view on writing and perfection.

22 thoughts on “It’s Always Something

  1. I’ve been taking my weekends as family and chore time. I find it frees my week for focusing on my writing. I don’t feel bad neglecting my chores during the week because I know I’ll tackle them when the weekend comes. I guess it’s just a matter of finding what works for you, like anything else. And honestly, unless you are having company, the chores can wait. Creativity, on the hand, doesn’t always wait. 😉
    Kelly Hashway recently posted….Monday Mishmash 11/11/13My Profile

  2. As hard as it may be, I’ve learned that with creativity comes the sacrifice of one’s time. If that means going to bed no later than 10pm to wake up by 5am, then so be it. Like Kelly, I try to balance time to write and network with family life and spending time with my love. Because my brain works better in the A.M. (and the added bonus is the skyline outside of my window and the stillness and peace while the world is still sleeping) I do most of my work in the mornings. This gives me the nights to spend time with family and the R&R I need after working at my day job which brings home the turkey bacon. And in this day and age, turkey bacon can be expensive! We all get side-railed because we are human. And it’s never too late to embark on your creativity. It’s not about how fast we got there but more about getting there in the first place. Another milestone I’ve learned to live with since most of my talents were washed away with nonsense and things which are no longer a part of my life. Don’t be so hard on yourself Hurricane Brenda. Someday, your work will sweep EVERYONE off their feet!
    gina recently posted….“Only If For A Night”My Profile

    • Gina – I try not to be, but as a flawed human I have my moments. I too am a morning person, but I write when I have pockets of time, the bulk of it getting done on the weekends when there are no meetings. I don’t about sweeping everyone, but I love the idea of that happening. Thanks, Gina for you thoughtful comments.

  3. Something’s always got to give. For me it’s TV – just don’t have the time to see Game of Thrones or Breaking Bad or Dancing With The Stars, and sometimes I feel left out when I hear/see people mention TV on Social Media. but… I’m writing. Or reading about writing, or thinking about writing.

    Housecleaning also gives. I don’t vacuum every week, even, nor clean the bathroom fixtures. Dishes can sit in the sink for a couple days till I’m at a stopping place (mind you, those with a bigger household may need to do ’em more frequently).

    And I’ve learned – I am STILL learning – that this writing “thing” is a sloooow process. Slow (for me) on a first draft, slow for rewrites, slow for hearing back from agents, slow for hearing back from publishers. I am learning not to stress about the pace of it all.
    Beverly Diehl recently posted….Burn Up Those Bookmarks, Baby!My Profile

    • Same here Bev, except for the washing dishes. There are more mouths than mine to feed so there is the nightly dinner and all that other stuff. Writing is a slow process. I’ve learned a lot this past year about it. Seems like I reach a point and think to myself, I have it! Then I am humbled my an Editor and realize… OH.. there is more.

  4. I love Hurricane Brenda. My family knows to seek shelter when Tropical Storm Astra blows in. On the other hand, I am learning that “having it all” is not all it’s cracked up to be. My comfort level with “I may be able to have it all, but not at the same time” is growing. If my “all” is still important in a few years, when there might be less mouths to feed and fewer dishes, then I will still be seeking to achieve it!! A terribly deep post as I quickly approach the big 5-0!
    Astra recently posted….Slow-Cooker Orange Chicken – A Hockey Family Food FavouriteMy Profile

  5. As I get busier with my “career,” my husband and I have realized that intentional planning at home is helpful. We sit down just about weekly (still getting used to the whole thing and miss now and then) to plot out who cooks which night, who’s got dance rehearsal driving duties, and which projects need the most attention (home/work). Meshing our schedules makes everything run easier.
    Karen Dawkins recently posted….5 More First Time Cruise TipsMy Profile

  6. Brenda, you said “I sometimes wish that I hadn’t waited so very long to chase this dream of being a writer.” Here’s the thing: you haven’t waited too late. You are always on time with whatever you do. Hindsight is one of the best instructors we have. What you didn’t know then, you know now. Sometimes we don’t morph into our true writer selves until later in life. Until the nest is empty. Until we’ve gained insights that were absent in our younger selves. Until life has instructed us on what or how to write. Until individuation has begun. I like to believe that everything we do is in season.
    Debra recently posted….Forgive or DieMy Profile

  7. My life, Brenda, is becoming more complicated though it is not what I have wished or asked for. I still need to move on with more of my novel series. I’ve returned to blogging only after a short respite (another one in December, from 9th to 14th as we will be on a much, much, much needed vacation at a mountain cabin).
    What I’ve realized is God is asking me to manage my time in different ways. Hard to make the changes, but I’m going with His flow, trusting that the words, the blogs, the novels, will flow from Him and through me, no matter how hectic the days seem. Sometimes, all we have is that trust. We can do nothing other than respond in faith.
    Thank you for brightening my day with your marvelous writing, my friend!
    Love and blessings always!
    Martha Orlando recently posted….The Voice of the LordMy Profile

  8. Brenda, I can so easily get caught in that wistful thought too but it does no good for what and where I am right now. And I’m going to trust that it’s not too late. What you’ve lived and been pulled away from writing for in your life, makes you a better writer now. I loved the comments to this post too – such insightful remarks.

    And thank you for the link to The Empty Nest Mom. Ten minutes at a time….at least they often get us going.

  9. OMG, Brenda, you have to read my blog that I posted today. It’s about time! Seriously, I wrote about time and time machines. So I had to laugh when I read what you wrote about time. Oh and by the way, don’t fault yourself for starting to write later than you’d hoped. It’s okay. All it means is that you weren’t ready before this. I’m the same way. I loved writing as a teen and in college. I wrote gads of poems and then I stopped. Just three years ago I picked it up. I had to wait all this time to discover 1) I have a knack for it and 2) it is my passion. So it’s okay, Brenda! The thing to remember is that you’re doing it now. You’re a writer and a great one at that!
    monicastangledweb recently posted….Time After TimeMy Profile

  10. Darn! I should’ve named the hurricane in my eBook Hurricane Brenda. LOL! 😉

    I always create a list of things that I need to do in order of priority. If it’s more important for me to write a chapter in my book than a chore around the house, I’ll write the chapter first then do the chore. Of course, I may not be the best role model. Lately, I’ve been so busy that there have been days when I’ve forgotten to eat lunch and had to grab a quick bite before it got too close to dinnertime.
    Chrys Fey recently posted….My Cover Reveal for HURRICANE CRIMES!My Profile

  11. For me, it’s a combination of balancing things on multiple dimensions… yes, I HAVE to balance things between work, kids, social life and creative energy, but also need to find balance in what and how I think about things….always trying to stay open and present and then reflecting upon it before I can even write about it. My list about what to write about is loooong, lol, but interestingly enough, sometimes I find my way to writing about a topic that sparked my interest a couple of years ago.
    Yvonne Berenguer recently posted….Maintaining Perspective in a Star-struck World…My Profile

  12. Dale

    This seems like the time for a comment like, “Instead of fretting over having it all, you should focus on what, of value, you have.” But I got way too much testosterone to write something like that!

  13. Brenda, your candid posts always inspire me to try to accomplish more, but I, too, have dreamed of a time machine to go back and start over. But like Claire wrote: “we are in the right time to be contributing our writing to the world, all our experiences that preceded this moment are part of what we are now creating.” And think of the simplicity of our computers! Could we have written as much and as openly without the support of our online followers? Or would our own self-doubts keep us from being who we really are? I now know I am in the right place at the right time. Thank you for sharing so deeply. Have an amazing day, sweet Brenda.
    Nancy MacMillan recently posted….PTSD / Diary of a Vet’s Wife / Bittersweet is NovemberMy Profile

  14. I love Hurricane Brenda – hilarious image! Sometimes I, too, wish I would’ve started this crazy passion of writing sooner. Also, flying. That’s probably the only advice I’d give younger me is to just go for it. The time is going to pass anyway, so why not have it pass doing something you love?! Well, because it’s scary! And I have doubts, and insecurities, and excuses. But I love reading stories of other writers, or hell, just other women, who have the same brand of crazy thoughts of doubt, but go for it anyway! Shine on, girl! It’ll all get done eventually. You’re inspiring :)
    Jill recently posted….You Can’t Argue With CrazyMy Profile

    • Thanks, Jill. I think we all have a little ‘hurricane’ inside. Me, too, about writer’s stories. Anyone fearless enough to stake a claim on their voice deserves accolades.

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