Heartburn

by Brenda on April 3, 2012

Heartburn

It’s a busy blogger month.  Some are A toZ’ing , others are PAD’ing (poem-a-day) via NaPoWriMo’ing. Sadly, I will not be participating.

My harsh mistress—the current WIP—has me on a short leash.  She’s eliminated all but agent sleuthing for the completed novel and writing pages for the new one. Like any toddler worth their weight, I threw a good tantrum, tossed my blocks, spilled my wine, whined and howled in public.  In the end, my harsh mistress relented knowing she can’t control me entirely. Resigned, she accepts I can’t resist the romance of poetry and has given me permission to dabble between pages.

As my current WIP is a story within a story, with one of the two being told through a cookbook of stories, Heartburn, didn’t feel like I was cheating on my WIP.

 

Hamburgers, crisp kosher pickles, almond butter and strawberry
jam on toasted whole wheat bread slightly burned,
pico de gallo with freshly chopped jalapeño-seeds too,
roasted Yukon potatoes, seasoned with roughly cut
rosemary, salt and extra pepper, butter instead of olive
oil, cooked until the center melts on your tongue, Rib eye
instead of New York, pink but not red, Pinot that teases
the back of the throat tingling the senses and not the
palate, hot mushy chocolate chip cookies fresh from the oven,
nibbled then gobbled until the extra room left from a dinner of
herb-roasted chicken and smashed potatoes, is filled.

Kisses that last longer than a breath, and taste salty, sweet,
and spicy, like cayenne pepper only hotter, hands that hold,
embrace, wrap, that tether me to you and you to me, words of
passion shared, lived, acted upon, between sheets and on top of,
in chairs, in moments stolen, invented and enjoyed, again and
again and again, until the meter runs out of dimes, the lights
restored, passions spent, phones ring, and messages left, a
love that is hot, scalding to touch, passions unexplainable, not defined
nor containable, but visible in the vapors wafting overhead
as we walk, talk, sit in proximity, the joy in the moment multiplies
in twos, until a love of one by one is given but not accepted by the other.

Green chili stew cooked in haste with heart friendly fat,
scooped up with delicately crunchy fried sopapillas, now soggy
with salty tears from the spice in the stew or is it the loss of his
passionate response to words that once left him undone,
tequila, bitter but effective, numbs the burn of the heat and
the heart-equally, but only until the sun burns away the
light of the moon, reminding another day is lost and too soon
followed by endless mornings of too many cups of Jamaican
mountain blue, stale Special K, two-percent, a teaspoon of
artificial sweetener, later a 90 calorie yogurt, a cup or two of pity
me, until the tequila can soothe the burn in heart and dim the
light of the night following the day.

 

What’s keeping you busy this month?

 

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{ 44 comments… read them below or add one }

Kelly Hashway April 3, 2012 at 10:21 am

Oh, those manuscripts can be demanding. I hope the words are still flowing easily for you Brenda. And I think it’s good that you are taking breaks for poetry. Sometimes the mind needs that little time away, and you’re still writing so you’re working your writing muscles.

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Brenda April 3, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Yes, Kelly, the writing of the second MS is coming along. I finished chapter 5 in the plane. What plagued me when I wrote Stella’s story is not what gets in my way now. Now I can way laid by the emotional pressure of finding an agent and asking all those 3 Am questions.. the ones of doubt. :-) I haven’t heard back from the agent asking for four week exclusivity and it’s been a month thus I am starting again. I am not sure if what I write is classified as poetry, but I like to pretend I know what I am doing.

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Nancy Hinchliff (@alekhouse) April 3, 2012 at 12:21 pm

Hang in there, Brenda. It’ll happen. I’ve gotten a few bites…but not that appears to be serious. Have the MS with an agent now. We’ll see. I guess everyone of us goes through some rejection…it’ll only make us stronger, right? Love your piece here. You’re such a good writer.

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Brenda April 3, 2012 at 2:15 pm

YAY!!! Nancy, sending good juju to the heavens Yes, I hear rejection makes us stronger. I am still waiting for the strength to flood into me. :-)

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Nancy April 3, 2012 at 1:09 pm

Sometimes the only response to stellar writing likes yours, Brenda, is “WOW.”

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Brenda April 3, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Ah, thanks Nancy. I don’t know those poets are writing a poem a day, it’s tough. I know most poems I’ve written I come back to again and again to tweak.

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Linda Medrano April 3, 2012 at 5:01 pm

You are so good it’s scary! Love your mastery of words!

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Brenda April 3, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Linda, from your lips .. thanks much. You know the writer is ever concerned about their bag of tricks and how well they are used.

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Beverly Diehl April 3, 2012 at 7:46 pm

Phew! Not sure if I am hungry, sated, or need a cigarette after that.

If you have not, yet, get a copy of Isabel Allende’s Aphrodite. All about love and cooking and poetry, together. Your work reminds me strongly of hers.

(btw, check your comment luv plug-in. It’s been blowing me off for a while now, and I notice none of your other commenters have links up either, so maybe it ain’t just me.)

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Brenda April 3, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Bev, not sure where I was going with it, but I liked the idea and hit publish anyway. I will look for that book. And thanks about comment luv plug in, will take care of that one tonight.

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Helen W. Mallon April 3, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Nice to meet you, Brenda! Glad I ran across your blog! I used to be a dancer, and after taking a break from it for a while to do visual art, I found that my dancing had actually improved somehow as a result. Don’t view your jazzy poetry as ‘less than’!

I hate to admit this, but navigating social media is taking me away from my WIP. Yes, I am willing to be distracted, but there’s an art to managing different kinds of word-time that I have not yet mastered.

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Brenda April 3, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Hi Helen, ditto. So glad you stopped by. Thanks for the comment re: poetry. I do enjoy messing with it even though I have my own style. You will find there are good and bad things to social media, good is you meet some wonderful writers – bad, huge time suck. I keep to a little schedule or try. I always put writing first, but it’s hard.

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Nikky44 April 3, 2012 at 8:22 pm

What’s keeping me busy this month?
reading Blogs, commenting on blogs, going to work, and living each day at a time :)

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Brenda April 3, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Nikky, sounds like a good plan. Keep writing, too.

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My Inner Chick April 3, 2012 at 11:51 pm

***Kisses that last longer than a breath, and taste salty, sweet,
and spicy, like cayenne pepper only hotter***

I love love love your wordssssssssss. <3

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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 5:49 pm

It is always a pleasure, Kim, to feel the love from across the great divide. xo

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Mamawolfe April 4, 2012 at 12:00 am

What an exercise in sensory details! Not an hour ago my 12 year old son was commenting that his English teacher told him to use more in his writing. I’m going to have to share this…and keeping me busy? Working, mothering, writing, living day by day…

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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 5:52 pm

Jennifer- I hope my dabble in prose is of some assistance to your 12 year old. I was thinking this morning on my way to work after three hours of calls how I need to engage in more self-marketing but then I asked myself when did I plan to do this …? ARGH!

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Astra April 4, 2012 at 12:40 am

That piece took me through about 12 periods of my lifetime … wow. Heartburn … what a good title for this one.
As April has started and hockey season over for another season, I feel rather liberated and hope to put that liberation to good work. Keep you posted :)

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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 5:53 pm

Astra – funny you mention the title, when I was messing with it I thought ‘food and love’ but when I decided to post it, ‘Heartburn’ was in my mind before I even opened a browser. Now you have me curious about what you will be doing.. Keep me posted.

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Claudine Gueh April 4, 2012 at 3:11 am

Brenda, hang in there with your WIP. I love your focus. While the rest are A-Zing, and writing poems everyday, you’re binding yourself true to your characters. They’ll know how much you love them. Keep writing, taking breaks for your blog, eating healthy, practising yoga, taking walks, and writing snippets of poetry. Your beautiful poetry.

I’ve been having a tough time with my next PB but when I finally worked out/revised the last line yesterday, the familiar satisfaction made me feel like a cowboy for a while. (And your post made me hungry. So I’m going to feed myself good now …)

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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 5:59 pm

Claudine – I am trying. The writing of the second novel is keeping me sane while I find an agent. I am always tickled pink when people like you and other readers comment so kindly about my ‘poems’. It is the one area of writing I do not adhere to any of the rules and live for the emotion. Congrats for getting that last line tweaked. Loved your expression, feeling like a cowboy. A good feeling.

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Monica April 4, 2012 at 3:46 am

Wow, you’re making me hungry! But, Brenda, it’s the same ol’, same ol’. Writing. It consumes me, and probably you, too. I love it and want to write, but sometimes I wish I had the luxury to veg, read a book or just hang out. Alas, it’s not meant to be. At least not for a while. Sigh.
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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 6:06 pm

Monica, it looks as if I made all hungry. And yes, I do relate to your feeling. When I want to lounge I can’t, and when I can, I don’t want to. My writing schedule and emotional self are sometimes in accord and other times, they bicker. I work around all of my pieces to get words on a page and to live a reasonably sane life, as much as I can.

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k~ April 4, 2012 at 4:30 am

Well I am one of those crazy A-Z’ers, and if I had known about the PAD’ing I would have been able to accomplish that simultaneously because while I am doing two blogs, both are poetry: one haiku, the other just whatever I want to… heheh…

I want to take your second paragraph with me, to savor, taste, remember, and enjoy over and over again. I LOVE it :-)

(mutters it out again…)

“Kisses that last longer than a breath, and taste salty, sweet,
and spicy, like cayenne pepper only hotter, hands that hold,
embrace, wrap, that tether me to you and you to me, words of
passion shared, lived, acted upon, between sheets and on top of,
in chairs, in moments stolen, invented and enjoyed, again and
again and again, until the meter runs out of dimes, the lights
restored, passions spent, phones ring, and messages left, a
love that is hot, scalding to touch, passions unexplainable, not defined
nor containable, but visible in the vapors wafting overhead
as we walk, talk, sit in proximity, the joy in the moment multiplies
in twos, until a love of one by one is given but not accepted by the other.”

Fantastic Brenda!
k~ recently posted….C ~ Child Born a Long Time AgoMy Profile

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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 6:11 pm

K- you are A-Zing.. Good luck with that. I do regularly participate with something called Round Robin.. Writers writing to a daily prompt and exchanging with another writer for feedback. It’s a daily event that lasts nine weeks. I just finished one so I had no interest in A-Z, although PAD I did and I would have if not for the book I am currently working on. My poet’s heart is so pleased you enjoyed. I had fun writing it. I do enjoy experimenting.

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k~ April 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Round Robin sounds like a great group for getting some constructive criticism. I am all for that type of feedback inducing collaboration.

Yeah, it’s my first time trying the A-Z, and I had enough foresight to choose to do it with poetry. That’s a pretty simple feat for me, so I ought to make it just fine (crosses fingers… just in case).
k~ recently posted….Staying ConnectedMy Profile

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Brenda April 5, 2012 at 4:24 pm

K- If you are determined and you are enjoying the process you will not fail. This is for you after all, the daily writing makes us writers stronger.

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Helen Smith April 4, 2012 at 8:53 am

Good luck with your book, Brenda – it sounds really interesting. I’m working on a novel that’s keeping me busy, too.
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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 6:15 pm

Thanks, Helen. I whine about the book keeping me busy, but secretly I am enjoying the story. I like my characters a lot. Good luck with your story.

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Jodi Aman April 4, 2012 at 9:56 am

Awesome Brenda, I love your writing, I am sure an agent will. Writer’s conferences are perfect places to meet agents!

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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 6:16 pm

Always a pleasure, Jodi. I have heard that about conferences, and hadn’t wanted to go, but I recently signed up for one. Oh joy.. :-)

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Martha Orlando April 4, 2012 at 12:45 pm

Oh, your writing, Brenda . . . just “wow”!!!
Hang in there; you’ll get it done!
Blessings to you!
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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 6:21 pm

Many thanks, Martha. I am hanging.

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Savira April 4, 2012 at 1:16 pm

Your play of words about food left me hungry!
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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 6:24 pm

Savira, sorry about that.. but I am jealous, where you are the food is delicious.

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Corinne Rodrigues April 4, 2012 at 1:46 pm

You don’t need those challenges, you’re in a class by yourself, Brenda. What’s keeping me busy? Not much really – just not in the mood for ‘work’ – it’s so hot and humid here at present….but I’ll get down to something soon enough!
Meanwhile, you dear lady, it’s just a matter of time before that manuscript is snatched up!
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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 6:25 pm

Hugs to you, Corinne. Oh yes, it’s that time of year for you. And from you lips to those that grant dreams and wishes.

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Nancy MacMillan April 4, 2012 at 2:13 pm

The way you entwine the textures of food with the textures of passion dazzle the senses. Your style is unique in every way. Why aren’t agents pounding on your door? It’s sure to happen soon. Love your work!

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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 6:28 pm

Hello, Nancy, it was intended to evoke those senses, which given the responses so far, it has. I don’t know if it’s done yet, but poems never are… I appreciate your good wishes.

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Elizabeth Young April 4, 2012 at 2:44 pm

You can’t stop inspiration Brenda, so don’t even go there! Absolutely loved this piece of brilliance and am so glad you succumbed to desire and wrote it down. Who knows if it won’t remain when many other things are gone? The caliber of this piece of work is intense, eccentric, heady and full – just the way I like them!

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Brenda April 4, 2012 at 6:30 pm

I am so glad to hear, Elizabeth. I do love dabbling with prose and seeing how far I can bend the rules.

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Dangerous Linda April 9, 2012 at 4:54 am

Hi, Brenda! ~

Your poem left me hungry
Then, HOT
Then, heartbroken

nooooooo!!!!!!!!
Dangerous Linda recently posted….the light speaksMy Profile

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Brenda April 10, 2012 at 6:56 pm

Good, Linda, then my job was done well.

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